Fake

This was absolute gold. I typically don't laugh out loud when watching stuff alone but this one had me cackling

"damn girl, you make me wish I can't read and spell that well" lmfao

This shit is so fuckin funny

Hot Cocoa - Hilarious!

4 and up..lol

"Paige thank. you so much. Im gonna play this later in the car, but I wanna hear it again."

Funniest man alive

"I caught a bass...he was shiverin'. " - Theo Vonn

Having a dicks like having a pet, a runt ferret with ADD 🤣🔥 the mans pure gold!

Dam I dont ever know if Theo's telling the truth lol

Rat King ain't jokin about that cold water, I live on the cowlitz river in WA (south of tacoma) and between winter and summer the water temp difference is a whopping 3 degrees -.-

Never met a girl name Paige that was ugly just saying

Put that pearl necklace on that cactus son

hahahahaha

I literally die listening to this guy! He’s hilarious

I’m surprised that I didn’t piss my fucking pants watching this shit because I was real close

#VEGETARIAN

Okay was she pre-recorded? Am I tripping?

MY SUITCASE DOESNT FIT IN MY APARTMENT

“Oh I gotta hear that again” 😂 💀

“I can’t tell if I’m being a pervert, or if I’m being regular.” Story of my life

I also had a hot English teacher freshman year that wore a red dress a lot. A few dresses but the red one was the best one

You cant appreciate the artistic element of a penis eating a piece of corn without watching it multiple times just thought I should say that

Random boners...

*Both* BUT you got to have respect!!!! Remember your mama okay!!!! 🌞🌝🌞🌝🌞🌝🌞🌝🌞🌝🌞🌝

Theo is the man 😂😂

Funniest dude

I just figured out these calls aren't live

Bro u are the most hilarious 🤣🤣

femiNINE lmfao

I’m dead

Onward

"I turn my loins into lions!" Great quote.

This is what happens when you don't watch porn. You start getting horny looking at a coke bottle.

Theo: “my dick had an old soul” (Hehehe - Killing!!)

Theo’s the best - he speaks my language , OR I should say, “I understand and very much appreciate his voice”. He’s coming in ‘hot’ today! ;) :)) Love, love , love this!! Lol

“Small ground game.” Can you be more specific Theo?

Hahahahahah theo a savage

Not sure how I feel about those plants... Looool

No porn and no jerk makes Theo go horny...

Shut up and let her talk boy

Lol, this chick wanted Theo's big boy so bad. He probably hit it already and be didn't even remember.

yooo 😂😂 2:52 this point blew my mind honestly, thank you theo.

She definitely doesn't listen to you no mo you stooge

😔💸😔💸😔💸😔💸😔 Damn Theo... called her a attractive without even seeing her she didn't even say thank you. He made a compliment on her he got like he got distracted and went on ADD kicks in.... But.. sometimes God damn that anyone says that to me these days I'll make sure I say it nicely backstage officiated awesome especially at my age! Goddamn people don't you have any man as I left out there especially after the X Generation definitely understand stuff that disease Millennium babies don't know not! That Bo yo about in between that's enough 60s up until 1980 that X generation is called and if you want to listen I'm also a mom effects that listens to your thing that also want you to know do you know what low-income families to eat Outlet of cpsa PA child protective services and Alex Jones talking to son it to Nancy Schaefer and regards to the corrupt business of Child Protective Services written by Nancy Schaefer herself! Etsy what happened to her and the book that she was doing name a name that never got names to the book never came out cuz somebody got late and all right! And I know they do this cuz I've had my whole family be a victim of this Lucky You video 2 GPS loves to hunt for kids that are low income if you didn't get bothered by them I wasn't needed with my family throwing up and they could have but it only became known to be out of a job for them an excuse to make themselves look good this is your court appointed lawyers family judges Guardian at litem corrupt counselors and doctors and they all get bonuses and incentives by jamala Shannon destruct in your household and Pickin on the parents or parent! Cherry picking through your kids to see if there's any was taken so they can get the incentives and adopt them out and get bonuses and kickbacks! And a lot of people are still very naively unaware of this to be in their cards and if you are asking for any help from the state or anyting . How they're not going to take celebrities kids obviously... unless it's really really bad and even then I didn't think so! Because being organized and meet to be harassed yes I might not be Einstein but I'm the box and being stupid either and I only reached out for help and dad got a hellish of a nightmare ! I want to go on to all the podcast Theo .. Right now they're looking at 1 and I'll do anything in my power to be able to get it out there and eventually put it on my ALthe video... I got too caught up in other stuff that this here will really show how they can find movies out of making it out of real people's real life....live and she made my story is like I feel like the photo presentation or what's going on is the beginning of a movie and people are still doing stuff that you couldn't even imagine cuz like I said now that in my wildest dreams could I make up this s*** but something told me in the head down my back of my mind I would be placed in a position where I would have to see how strong I am as a character in Django to see what I can do to fix a broken system which is not mine to fix because it's a huge system which needs to be revamped aka CPS!!! 👀💸👀💸👀💸👀💸👀

Lee JG Anderson

6 muaj më parë

🍀🌞🍀🌞🍀🌞🍀🌞🍀Question girls follow the money and then there's a bar so I don't pay one at all at my age be fine and perky and I'm old and yet I say it to my cat driving it gets him all excited to ask more questions it's funny how you guys get to be a certain age and you still don't a cat pictures you should at times but you know you're proving something to me that I've always known no matter how wet you make some money or what you have for looks yourself what you look for in a woman is the most purest or forms but the rest of the bodies yet the guy will look not quite the same way and I'm thinking I was such a fan if you want somebody project what's make sure you have something worth looking at or stroking at! Get it got it good peace out!! Attention at all the holidays to be counted as poor checking if a girl doesn't want you to watch her what she's getting dressed and yellow already together as a couple remember she's afraid you might call on something that isn't her best feature and that's why why she wouldn't let you take a shower or anything else in that regard so you can't blame girls they've been up to use a lot more and also fat shaming which is something critical is a lot of relationship and it's almost like how did people get together in the first place that's what I asked my phone relationship at time with face it when we first meet each other at the only see the best other person and then will we start seeing some true colors which still aren't always bad just not what we really wanted at 4 but you adjust to some degree but if it gets worse then the relationships going to get for us but those little hiccups if you're lucky you get by most of them but if you have huge want happened to you such as a horrific illness or some had a heart attack stroke even at an early age even if they we're not ones to take drugs or I do anything to put them at risk and they still have the heart attacks and strokes at a younger age today which is under about 15 to have one even 50 pounds is the average to me someone who was the 48th and had one April first.. So again you never camping make sure what's going to happen so live your life as much as possible! Do the things that you normally put back on the back burner.... I find all the stuff I have on the back burner I want out front and I want to finish working on them! and now is the best time of all to get those done and the season unless it gets too hot and don't do it at all if you're risking your health!

Lee JG Anderson

6 muaj më parë

I say that to my cab dry but he gets all excited to all because I say I don't wear one cuz I don't

This is the funniest shit ever.

"that wasn't an mmmmm for middle school volleyball"

4:30 😂😂😂😂

this is yet another notch up in his game, he's so in the zone right now, fucking totally hilarious! my dick has also seen an old printing press in the background!!

This whole thing is wild, boy.

Louis CK 😂😂😂😂😂

I’d turn into Loui C.K 😂😂

A runt ferret with attention deficit disorder

hahahah daammn that louis CK joke got me ded

I never had a hot teacher 😕 I wish I did tho

This was a bit weird son

Ya almost pulled a D’Elia at 2:00 bbooooooiiiiiiiiiii

"Here's how sexy she was, I remember she wore red...that's all I remember... She may have NEVER worn red."

Theo is like 10/10 attractiveness. This is the most important element here. Everyone should move forward in their assessments with this in mind.

Sara

3 muaj më parë

@Will Sorry I can't remember what this video is about. I feel like sometimes he tells stories from the perspective of like he's a "normal guy." But he's attractive and they have a different experience in life than other people.

Will

3 muaj më parë

What do you mean?

Theo is so sharp! Funny as hell! One of a kind!!

This is easily the funniest von clip I ever seen lol

Only 50seconds in and im dying bc he's so right about the damn cold water

This is the best one yet😂😂😂😂

I loved this video so much I just spent 100 bucks on theo's merch.

Theo your style comedy is like no one else’s I love it.

I wouldn’t mind a call from my hot middle school teacher

"Phhhhhhhhhhh....!WHAT!"

I'm not gonna watch it more than one time lol fuck! shit made me laugh

“ I don’t know if I am being a pervert or if I’m just being regular”

😂😅

She’s a great story teller, very visually descriptive.

What did you get taught by Jessica Rabbit? Later after this video was posted, theo reconnected to a former educator...male? Female? Find out next time

Hi caller

I knew that the old video I’ve got of my penis eatin a kernel of corn would eventually come in handy, I’m getting it converted over from laserdisc so I can send it to you Theo... gang gang

"I'm going to play this, again, later in the car." Theo is a FOOOOL. I love it.

Are we sure Theo is sober?

thomas crown

6 muaj më parë

Dont you dare put that out into the universe. He better be sober. Bet he hopped back on porn after this call tho.

Yo. Theo. Like I said SPI. SOUTH PADRE ISLAND...........u 100...bro

#Vegetarian 😅😅😅

All u gotta be is a 4 or up to be attracted to Daddy 😂😂

The fish selling out Hot Coco in desperate 🤣🤣🤣

Caught a bass it was shivering 😂😂😂

The wiener loiter joke got me.

😅

Theo fell back off that sex wagon.

I’d put a pearl necklace on a cactus 😂😂🤣🤣

Middle school history teacher here 🧔💪

I haven't seen a video this retarded and hilarious in a while. Thanks Theo.

He’s mad he didn’t here this before his show and not after 😂

I turn my loins into lions boyy

He’s funny sometimes but sometimes what he says makes absolutely no sense

Not really seeing the point of going over a pre recorded conversation and you just being a creep man

So cringy 😆

Bass fuckin shiverin ROFL

Inbred genius

I thought you were gonna shut up 2:21

Shut up and let her talk! Onward.

Mmhmm, Theo. Loins to Lions! High school teacher/soccer coach right here. Come on with it!

Nic Doe

6 muaj më parë

She want that Gang

the 25 people that disliked this video at the time of this comment are cucks. or they misread it and thought they clicked "dis I like" instead of dislike

Theo, I demand we get this lovely teacher on a video call. We need to get that visual representation of our fantasy.